3 Facets of a Fulfilling Life

Life is a complex thing.

We are born into this world with no instructions but what is encoded within our DNA. Science can tell us what those helix strands mean, but it us up to us as individuals to manifest our own unique signatures. This is not destiny, but a choice, and there are many among us who will never make that ultimate decision to seize seize the day (“carpe diem” for you Roman time travelers).

Here are my thoughts on three facets of what makes a fulfilling life. Whether in old age you gaze back on your life and are ravaged by regrets, or are refreshed by satisfaction at a life well lived, I believe can be boiled down to three simple aspects of human experience which need mindful discipline.

tl;dr: Physical stress, mental challenge, and spiritual attainment

1) The Physical

Socrates said it best:

“No citizen has a right to be an amateur in the matter of physical training…what a disgrace it is for a man to grow old without ever seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable.” 

Our bodies are incredible vehicles shaped over millions of years by our ancestors. Every generation of humanity decides the course for the next by the physical stress which their bodies are submitted to whether by choice or by necessity. In this peaceful age of ours, it is so easy to become lax and give in to a sedentary lifestyle. Only know that by this we are hurting the generations to come. Science has recently shown us that our DNA is permanently effected by obesity. Why just obesity? All of our actions effect the course that our species is on, and we all have an active hand on where our destination will end. If the idea of helping yourself into better physical shape is not enough to rouse you to action, then consider the health of your ancestors and the physical health of the human species in general.

Now let’s put aside the (un cited) evolutionary reasons and focus on the quote above. Socrates mentions two reasons why physical fitness is a good idea: strength and beauty. That a strong body is a good body should go without saying. Being able to carry a weight, to run a distance, to swim, and, if needed, to defend yourself are all considered the very best reasons to become fit in the first place. Most people who have been practicing a physically healthy lifestyle will tell you that these are, ultimately, the reasons why they workout at all. But! beauty is just as important. We are the only creatures on Earth (that we know) that can distinguish beauty in nature. Why shouldn’t we workout also to look good? Beauty is a great thing and though it should never be the sole focus of fitness, I believe that not acknowledging this crucial aspect can hamper the strength part tremendously.

Physical exercise is known to boost the mood, make one less susceptible to illness, and produce greater feelings of attraction in romantic partners. There are only good reasons to engage in this behavior, but it should also be mentioned that there is an extreme in this activity that is very unhealthy. Too much of a good thing can be bad, and this is very true with working out. There are those who have forgotten why they began their fitness programs to begin with. Some men who began weight lifting only to attract women end up spending much more time pumping iron in the mirror than dating. In some cases, people expend their bodies too much for this addiction and their hearts give out. There are several notable examples of fitness fiends who have done just this, and we all know the “fitness nut” who is more interested in his body fat percentage than in other people.

As with the rest of this post, the theme of balance is very important. If one only spends their day challenging their body (aside from those who have made it their profession) then they risk the underdevelopment of the other two facets below. I have not written at all about the importance of a healthy diet, but that should go hand in hand with a healthy body. Cut sugar out of your diet!

2) Mental

I call it having the heart of a student. Approaching this world as an opportunity to expand your mind is the privilege and the responsibility of every person. We have complex and capable minds that need stimulation, so do not allow your mind to atrophy. Like your body, your mind needs a particular diet and there is such a thing as junk food when it comes to education. Also like your body, your mind will only grow when you accept challenge into your life. Real learning is an active pursuit, and so merely watching Youtube videos on history (though plenty informative if they are good) will never surpass the action of finding the information yourself. Your brain will remember the information much better if you approach education with more than one prong. Watch Youtube, but also find books on the subject. Also, go out of your way to investigate your interests in the real world. Just because you are no longer in school does not mean you cannot take a field trip!

How to use the internet as a tool for education: become an active user. Instead of mindlessly watching videos, take notes. Make a list of vocabulary. Write down dates and names. Try to teach others about what you have learned. The internet is a tool, but most of us use it only as a television on steroids. Enough has been done to our minds with this age of instant gratification. My grandfather had to memorize poetry has a young student, and he could still recite The Raven at 90 years old. Not only do I believe this kept his mind sharper as he aged, but it also brought him a lot of joy. Our brains are capable of so much that to see us being mentally hamstrung by the internet is shameful.

But there is still a balance to be maintained…

There are those whose “heart of a student” beat louder than the rest. They have neglected the physical aspect of their human existence in favor of vacationing (permanently) in the world of abstraction. These people have, generally, high IQs, multiple degrees, high cholesterol, and the posture of a puddle…

I am speaking of the academics! Now, I do not want to cast a blanket statement, but, as a metaphor, the image of the tireless scholar burning the midnight oil in the search of truth while their body wastes away is easily recognizable. Is there a better image than that? Is this person any less of an abuser of their existence than the body builder who injects synthol and ingests human growth hormone (HGH) until their intestines grow too large and burst out of their stomach? All this to say stay balanced in your life.

3) Spiritual

And now we come to the topic most difficult to write about. It is difficult because my definition of spirituality will be so different to the person who reads this. To me, what it means to be spiritual (at this point in my life) is all about communing with nature. I do not mean only mediating under a water fall, but enjoying all of nature. I am talking about other human beings. This is the third aspect of the triangle and I believe it goes on top.

Imagine a young man who has been very diligent in the physical and mental aspects of his life. He maintains a consistent fitness regime, he eats clean food, and he challenges himself mentally by actively pursuing education. On the surface he appears to be a very well rounded individual. People notice his work ethic, they see his fit body, and if they know him well then they are aware that he has educated himself and can speak on numerous topics with some depth. So, superficially, he is all the things that we value in human society. But, just like the body builder and the academic in the previous topic (I love academics and body builders, they are only examples) he has sorely neglected one part of his life. This young man cannot stand talking with people. He is the type who will casually mention that they bore him. That their conversations cannot hold his attention, that their work ethics are contemptible et cetera et cetera.

This young man has forgotten why he began to better his life in the first place: In order to share with others his experiences. There is a concept of bringing something to the campfire that, I am sure, came about during our ancestors’ bitter winter nights. What do you bring to the campfire? We all must leave for a time, but when we return, what have we learned? Have we found food to feed the others? Did we discover information that will make life easier? Did we at least come back with a good story? This is the spirituality that I speak of. Communing with other people is the third facet of a fulfilling life and, likely, the only one that truly matters in the long run. The happiest people I know are not the fittest or the smartest, but are the ones who know how to fellowship with their neighbors in life.

So ask yourself two questions: What am I bringing to the campfire? and, What kind of person do I want at my campfire?